Unarmed & Unorthodox Pt. Three

Part Three: The Lies You Tell a Nun

My favorite thing about the nuns I stayed with is the ridiculous lengths they go to to be hospitable. The minute the 5 a.m. service was over, one of the nuns came over to me. I was suspicious at first because I wasn’t sure this nun even knew who I was, so I thought she was going to scold me because I forgot to ask if it was okay that I came to service that morning even though I wasn’t orthodox. Or maybe she was going to tell that I didn’t do that prerequisite gestures right before entering in the Nave, so I better leave because I was making their holy air unclean. As my pulse raced, she leaned into my ear and asked softly, “How do you like your eggs done?”

I looked at her as she saw confusion in my eyes.

“We can fry them, scramble them, boil them…”

Wait, I’m not in trouble? I thought to myself. I laughed softy and realized what she was asking. I smiled and replied, “Scrambled.” Just like my mind.

As I made my way back to the room where I was staying, several nuns approached me along the way to ask numerous questions about the comfort of the house that I had slept in. Things like if the temperature was alright and if there was anything more I needed. I waved each question off, assuring each nun that everything was perfect. I didn’t want to inconvenience any of the nuns further, even if I had been a bit cold in the house that night. The nuns that inquired seemed somewhat annoyed when I did this. It was like they did not like the fact I wasn’t allowing them to do stuff for me. It wasn’t until much later that I realized that by automatically turning down their offers to help me, I was robbing these women of their opportunity to offer hospitality. They wanted to care for me, a stranger; this was all part of their worship to God. I was kindly lying to the nuns in an effort not to inconvenience them, while in reality I was hurting them as I was neglecting to give them a part of me for their undertaking.

Caring for a stranger, offering hospitality, and giving to those in need are all a part of our worship to God. I knew this, yet it didn’t even occur to me that I would be on the receiving end of it.

I realize I do this more often than not, maybe not in the form of a hospitable nun, but in the form of a caring friend. Each time someone who cares deeply about me asks how my day is going or how things have been in my life, I write them off with an instinctual “I’m fine.” When that is not answering their question at all. Questions such as these are opportunities to allow others to love you, disguised as a simple greeting. But to answer their inquiry with honesty and let them into your life is offering an opportunity for their worship to God. Automatically answering with an, “I’m good”, may not be an outright lie, but it may not certainly be entirely true. Give unto others as you would have them give to you. That means I would like to love my friends deeply in the same way I am told to love my neighbor as I love myself. I want them to know that I am not too prideful to accept their help, just like any nun would approve of.